Porkchop (2010)

Partying, Mayhem and Gore... '80s Style

I know this may come as a surprise to some of you, but I watch a lot of low-budget shite, and when I sat down to watch Porkchop that's pretty much what I expected - low budget shite.  And that's what this movie delivered.  However, along with this shite, Porkchop also delivered some pure freakin' gold.  In fact, I couldn't believe how much I liked this movie.  It's like a bizarre combination of shit and gold... a golden shit nugget.  Porkchop is a golden shit nugget.

It's like everyone involved knows they're in a $10 000 movie so they don't take things too seriously or try to make it into something it's not.  It's an '80 slasher throwback not a cerebral art-house piece. The acting is atrocious which only adds to the appeal of the movie and some of the dialogue is so bad that it made me groan and then laugh out loud.  Maybe that's what makes this movie so appealing: the charisma of the actors.  They awkwardly deliver their crappy lines and then you feel compelled to laugh along with them because they're so likeable.

Porkchop is a tale of a killer and some campers.  That's pretty much the plot.  Six young acquaintances and an uncouth robot head out into the wilds of West Virginia to do some drinking and merrymaking.  Around the campfire a tale is told of a bulbous, redneck killer who wears the head of a pig upon his own and hunts those who intrude into his woods.  Only it isn't just a story.  It's true!  Porkchop lives and breathes and kills in these wooded hills of West Virginia and he begins hunting down these campers one by one.  After one of the ladies has sex with the robot, of course.

If you haven't noticed I liked this movie quite a bit.  I wish there were more boobies but not too many movies feature robot coitus, so it has that going for it.  Also one of the girls gets a chainsaw in the cooch which was good to see, or not good to see depending on your perspective.

So in conclusion, if you only see one '80s throwback slasher with robot-fucking this year, make sure it's Porkchop.  It truly is a golden shit nugget.

Wait!  I have to do a pun on the name Porkchop...  Porkchop, it truly is a choice cut.  A cut above?  Bloody good?  Ah whatever.

Violence Rating: 4 out of 5
Booby Rating: 3 out of 5

 Get it at TLACult